Dette innlegget sto på trykk i Uhørt-spalten til iTromsø lørdag 1. februar.
Kall meg besserwisser om du vil. Eller be meg feie for egen dør. Dette innlegget har jeg gått svanger med en stund. Nå må det bare ut.
Nettvett er ingen enkel sak. Jeg har tre barn. Nettvett er et tema som opptar meg. Men stadig oftere slår det meg. Er nettvett relevant bare for den kommende generasjon? Eller burde vi voksne bli litt flinkere til å reflektere over vår egen opptreden på nett? Skjønner du ikke hva jeg snakker om? Ta deg en tur innom kommentarfeltet hos en av landets nettaviser. Alle som har tilbragt et minutt eller to i den gørra der vet at det knapt finnes grenser for hva voksne folk klarer å lire av seg i det offentlige rom. Selv når de kommenterer med Facebook-profilen sin, altså med fullt navn og bilde, strør enkelte om seg med bannskap, sjikane og usakligheter du knapt har sett maken til. Det er fristende å idioterklære hele gjengen. Men kan det være at mange rett og slett mangler grunnleggende kunnskap om digital kommunikasjon?
Kommentarfeltet hos landets nettaviser er ikke det eneste stedet som flyter over av eder og galle i skriftlig form. Oppgulp av tvilsom karakter kan komme som kommentarer på statusoppdateringen til en du kjenner. I en Facebook-gruppe med mennesker du møter i hverdagen. For det er et eller annet som skjer når ellers sindige mennesker lar seg hisse opp på nett. Da går rullegardinen ned og en ordflom uten sidestykke flommer ut via tastaturet. Det er rent fascinerende.
Mange vil hevde at digital kommunikasjon slett ikke er så forskjellig fra analog kommunikasjon. Jeg er ikke uenig. Det er gjerne de samme reglene som gjelder enten du snakker med noen ansikt til ansikt eller på nett. Og det er nettopp det vi har så lett for å glemme. For i en samtale på nett mangler en rekke av signalene man tar inn over seg i en vanlig samtale. Stemmeleie. Ansiktsuttrykk. Kroppsspråk. I en samtale på nett har du bare det skrevne ord å forholde deg til. Du ser ikke mennesket du snakker med. Dermed blir det vanskeligere å tolke budskapet. Klarer du kanskje ikke å fange opp ironien i det avsenderen skrev? Leser du ting mellom linjene som slett ikke er der? Og ikke minst, hvor kjapp er du i avtrekkeren når du selv skal legge igjen ditt digitale fotavtrykk i en kommentartråd som kanskje nærmer seg kokepunktet?
En av de største utfordringene med kommunikasjon på nett er at mottakeren synes så fjern. Man glemmer liksom at det sitter et sprell levende menneske med tanker og følelser bak skjermen i andre enden. Hvor farlig kan det egentlig være om den kommentaren ble litt vel spydig? Alle skjønner vel at du ikke mente det bokstavelig da du ønsket meningsmotstanderen din god tur til et veldig, veldig varmt sted? Et godt råd er å lese kommentaren din en ekstra gang før du publiserer. Står du inne for det du har skrevet? Hadde du sagt det samme om personen du henvender deg til sto i samme rom som deg? Og hadde du uttrykt deg som du gjør om andre overhørte samtalen? For det gjør de på nett. Som mor syns jeg det er en nyttig øvelse å vurdere om jeg hadde vært komfortabel med at barna mine kom over en diskusjon jeg deltar i. Og jeg mener ikke at de ikke tåler å se at mamma har meninger. Men hvordan diskuterer jeg? Evner jeg å skille sak og person? Eller går jeg rett i strupen på personen som sier meg imot?
Kommunikasjon er vanskelig. Ikke minst på nett. Men noen ganger er det rasende enkelt. Noen ganger handler det ikke først og fremst om kommunikasjon, men om god, gammeldags folkeskikk.
Illustrasjonsfoto: iStockphoto.com
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